Golden Globes 2020

I give less of a shit about the Golden Globe awards than Ricky Gervais. I don’t go to the movies, and find the self-congratulatory and masturbatory spectacle of Hollywood awards shows to be distasteful. But, Gervais was an excellent host, and his monologue is well worth watching. In case you missed it, give it a watch, because it’s legitimately hilarious–because he offended everyone possible. They all deserve to be roasted.

He made a joke about Felicity Huffman’s making license plates (i.e., in jail) because of her ridiculous abuse of wealth in the college-admissions system.

He suggested that many of them were afraid of Ronan Farrow, the journalist who doggedly chased down the Harvey Weinstein sex-abuse scandal and pushed for the story to be published when NBC refused. (Read about how disgusting Hollywood is in his book Catch and Kill.)

Gervais stated matter-of-factly that the Hollywood foreign press is “very, very racist” because so many actors of color were snubbed for nominations.

He made another sex-abuse joke when he suggested that convicted abuser Jeffrey Epstein was friends with many of the people in the audience.

But my favorite part was when Gervais told the actors not to be up their own arses about morality and politics–because they are all so self-serving that they would call their agents if ISIS started its own production company. After all, he said, they moralize while working for some of the most amoral companies on earth: Disney, Amazon, Apple.

This is an important point. These celebrities have enormous influence over the global public, and being an “activist” is trendy. But, as Gervais pointed out in an interview, they all arrive at the event in separate limousines–so what right do they have to bloviate about the environment?

Gwyneth Paltrow is an excellent example of someone who should never advocate for anything. She’s allegedly “beautiful,” and she’s also allegedly a talented actress. I personally contest both of those claims, but one thing she is NOT is a person with any clue about health and well being. Yet her “lifestyle” website, Goop, suggests that women insert a jade egg into their vaginas, and that women also steam their vaginas (presumably after removing the egg?). And we have this product, 16 ounces of coconut water with aloe, for $50 for “hydration.” It’s fucking SOLD OUT. Honestly, selling this shit on the Internet, for that amount of money, should be considered predation on vulnerable people. Until Gwyneth Paltrow trots out legitimate double-blind scientific studies to prove that these products have any benefit to a person’s health, she should be shut down.

The entertainment industry in general is a blight on the environment. So at best, most of the performers and directors at the Golden Globes were mildly hypocritical.

Joaquin Phoenix is the most upstanding citizen among them (and even he, to Gervais’s point, probably took his own limo to the event, though I don’t have definitive knowledge of that). Phoenix has been a vegan since he was 3 years old, and according to Moby (another vegan), Phoenix was instrumental in pushing the Hollywood foreign press to make the entire event vegan.

I’ve always been a fan of Joaquin’s older brother River (deceased since 1993), who was an animal-rights activist and was, according to articles and biographies that I’ve read, the driving force behind the family’s veganism. His family has a long track record of taking a strong stand on moral issues. I can stomach his moralizing without wanting to vomit. Apparently, Joaquin Phoenix has even decided to wear a single tuxedo to all of this year’s Hollywood events, and it’s made by Stella McCartney–a vegetarian who doesn’t use animal products in her designs.

Until the other actors measure up to his standards, they should shut their pie holes about the environment. (Because god forbid they should have a vegan meal because it’s cruelty free.)

 

Adopt, Don’t Shop

This isn’t an original idea, but I want to honor my fur babies after which this site was named, by advocating for adoption. When you buy an animal from a breeder, that’s one more animal that stays in a shelter without a home. If you adopt from a no-kill shelter, you’re really saving two lives, because that opens a space for another animal to be rescued from the street or a high-kill shelter like the city Animal Care & Control (aka the city pound).

The picture on the home screen is of CRISPR (pronounced like Crisper), a kitty that we adopted in August. When CRISPR was found on the street, someone had broken both of his back legs. The asshole literally snapped his legs. The vets could only save one of them. So he’s a delightful three-legged 3-year-old cat.

My other cats, whom you see below, are Serena (black) and Athena (tortoiseshell/calico). All three cats have irrepressible kitty spirit.

Serena!
Athena!

Truly, rescued animals should inspire all of us to be better people. Humans—myself included—can feel defeated by the simplest misfortunes. Last year, when I fractured my femur, I thought I couldn’t go on. I still can’t do any kind of serious exercise. Some days, I truly feel like the a satellite is crashing down on my head because it seems so terrible not to be able to practice karate or run on a treadmill.

And then I can look at my cats. CRISPR is missing a leg and was terribly abused by some asshole(s). Yet, he was so determined to live that he practiced and practiced and now he can jump everywhere in my house that the other cats can jump, except the counter. And he loves people! He lets out an “I want a lap NOW!” war cry every time he sees a human sit on the couch.

Serena was homeless and watched all of her kittens get adopted while she sat at the shelter. That was more than 11 years ago now. She is so picky about humans that I considered proposing to my husband when she “chose him” for me by sitting on his lap. She has a giant scar on her neck from a street fight. And yet she is happy and loves me….and cat nip. She loves her nip.

And, finally, there’s Athena. Athena was rescued from a jerk who was using her as a kitten factory. We don’t know how many litters of kittens she had, but when she was finally rescued, she was pregnant yet again. The vet suspected, based on the condition of her female bits, that she had had many litters. And she gets chronic mammary gland tumors. One surgery was so huge that she was put on a fentanyl patch for the pain. And yet there she is every day, carrying socks and underwear around our house and leaving them on our bed and on the couch as gifts for us.

My cats really do inspire me. If they can experience traumas of which we’ll never really know, and still wake up every day and be delighted to be alive and be cats, then we can go on and push through, too.

And like the kitties, we might need help to do it.